March 27, 2004

Thirty weeks (and two days)

Ah, home... home... home... I just LOVE seeing everyone in California and we had a fabulous time last week. But, there's just nothing like coming home, is there?

My sister, Kehau (with some help from my mom, Chris, and sister, Tina) threw us the be-all, end-all of all baby showers last weekend! Check out this darling cake:

Well, maybe it's a little hard to see the cake, but it has a sweet pea on it with a baby's face. She had tulips everywhere (my very favorite flower) and every single details was tended! Close your eyes and imagine (or remember, if you were there): sugar pea wrapped prawns, crab filled mushrooms, chocolate fondue... yea, I KNOW!

I must also say, we scored some really awesome gifts for the baby, too. It was wild opening the gifts; experiencing these layers of realization: "they are giving us these teeny, sweet baby items because we are going to have a BABY!" I know it sounds strange, but it's just so hard to make the leap from this growing belly, even with the increasing movement and... girth (as my dad so eloquently calls it), to a real live baby. I could have cried a number of times, realizing how lucky we are to have so much support and love in our lives, represented by our friends and family there (in person and spirit) that day. It didn't help that my sister, Angie, actually crocheted and sent from Louisiana a sweet baby blanket and wrote in the card about wrapping our baby in all her love with the blanket. Took all I had not to just burst crying.

We are really getting quite set up now with baby supplies. What I didn't realize is that we will actually need an additional house in which to hold all of these supplies. I'm thinking we need to get into the baby supply business in some way. It's incredible all the baby-specific stuff there is.

Particularly fun was the number of pregnant friends and family at the shower. There were four of us in total: our friend Dee (32.5 weeks), our friend Amy (18 weeks), my Uncle's wife Paula (gave birth 3/25 - congratulations Uncle Mike, Paula, Kerry, and new baby Devon Violet!)), and me (thirty weeks). Here's me and Dee and bellies:

Peculiarly, Dee used her belly to guess the circumference of my belly (for that classic "guess the belly size" shower game) and it was the same size as mine. She won the game. Hmmm.

March 18, 2004

Twenty-nine weeks

We're off to California for almost a week, leaving tomorrow morning at 7am (yea, best laid plans - but by 8 at the latest!)

March 17, 2004

We had our first Bradley birthing class last night. Our teacher, Nicole, says I need 80 to 100 grams of protein and a gallon of fluid per DAY! Hello! - can you say, "rolly poly"?

In dream news, Jim dreamt that we were in a flying wherehouse in which people were dancing with babies.

March 16, 2004

I've decided that in the delivery room, for my post delivery celebration, I request a pitcher of margaritas (it's this gorgeous weather!) and a giant tray of sushi.

March 14, 2004

I've been having all these weird dreams lately. I keep wishing I'd dream about the baby - maybe get just a little sense of her or him in real life.

Instead I dream of holding other babies. Which can be fun, of course. The other night I dreamt I was holding Miles (our new nephew.) In the dream, I was even telling Jenn (our sister-in-law, and Miles' mom) how I was wishing I'd dream about our baby but instead I dreamt about Miles. Then the dream got sad and everyone was upset with us about something and no one wanted to hang out with us. It was very strange - isolating feeling. Maybe it has to do with the whole mystery of impending, unknown motherhood... hmmm. It took an even stranger turn when in the sky, amidst a bunch of clouds, a circular section of the clouds would flash and suddenly crystallize to ice then the ice crystal would fall gleaming to the ground. It was beautiful and confusing. Actually, as I write this, it reminds me of Superman! Just free-associating... What do you think it means?

Then last night I dreamt that Jim was the father of another woman's baby (one of my students - but, not in my dream) because they were married for a short time before he and I got together. I'm pregnant in the dream and he is taking care of both of us. Thoughts on that one? (Jim's thoughts: "it's not true!! - whew!")

March 13, 2004

I was in an all day silent meditation retreat today. The baby had hiccups, which made me want to giggle. Sometimes it just feels like s/he and I are sharing secrets all day.

I forgot to tell you that we felt the baby's head during our midwife appointment on Thursday! I'm not kidding - Mickie was poking around at my belly then she said, "Here - feel this. That's your baby's head." I guess s/he's breech right now (which Mickie says changes all the time at this stage and not to worry.) It was unbelievable. I could feel one side and then the other side, between my two hands! It seemed maybe four inches wide or so. Then she had Jim feel it and he visibly melted - then apologized to the baby profusely for the pokes. He's going to be one (awesome) sucker of a dad!

March 11, 2004

Twenty-eight Weeks

Then they took blood, which makes me very nervous. So, Jim danced for me the entire time, to keep me distracted. (Also, I was a captive audience since I certainly wasn't going to look away toward the very lifeblood streaming out of my body.)

Tomorrow is the last day of regular classes. Ten more persuasive speeches to go, then a couple of easy final days, then fa-la-la - SPRING BREAK! Margaritas and barbeque! Ah, to dream...

We met with another builder today, to do some competitive bid gathering. Not lovely news - seems our current plans "don't work." Also, there's no way he could build it for anywhere near the price we got from the first builder. I just left a message for the first builder - we need to talk.

March 10, 2004

Jim's been working hard on his mom's house next door. Here he is texturing the walls...

March 8, 2004

Today feels significant in the baby growing experience. I was in my second class of the day, listening to the seventh persuasive speech of my morning, unconsciously resting my arm on my belly while I scribbled student feedback notes. Suddenly I felt a big, strange rolling movement under my arm. A millisecond later, before I was even conscious of the rationality of the events, I realized this strange sensation was originating in my belly! I was literally startled almost to a visible jump! Yea, the baby's been moving for a while now - but never like THAT! The movements have been more kick and tap-like. They have felt more like... well, digestion (am I allowed to say that?) with the occasional gentle but enthusiastic HI-YAH! thrown in. This felt like a BIG baby, rolling around inside me, and jutting out of my belly through the skin. Can the baby grow that significantly overnight? It happened again, though less dramatically while I was at Royal Blend grading papers (my regular grading spot. Snack: decaf coffee and a delicious, crunchy Hazelnut Zebra Be-Bop biscotti.)

Jim has jury duty tomorrow. He's not happy about it.

March 6, 2004

Twenty-seven Weeks (and two days)

Everyone keeps telling me I am "blossoming" by the day (well, not everyone uses that exact word, but one person did and I like it the best.)

It's funny - people no longer ask, "How are you?" Or, "How's it going?" Instead they say, very specifically, "How are you feeling?" To which I always reply, "Great, thanks! How are you feeling?" That seems to confuse them for a moment. I guess "How are you feeling?" is specific pregnancy language. They also always say, "Well, you look GREAT!" - which, 1) I really enjoy, and 2) I think is interesting. I wonder if they are surprised that I'm looking alright or it is because they know pregnancy can be a time of... well, body image issues.

March 5, 2004

I was asked by the Department Chair at work how many classes I think I'll be able to teach next year. How am I supposed to have any realistic idea at this point? I can't even imagine what it will be like to have a baby, much less a baby and a job. Would it be weird to bring the baby with me to teach Speech??

I'm afraid once he or she arrives, I'll never want to leave him or her (is that you laughing, all you long time veteran mothers who are thinking, "oh, you'll want to leave them sometimes..."?)

I told them two classes to start, in Fall. And, I need time in between so Jim can bring the baby for feeding. We'll just have to see from there.

Advice solicitation: What do you think? How would you/did you feel leaving your baby at four months (this would be about eight hours a week) to go to work?

March 2, 2004

Met with the builder team again today. We have finalized the general plan: make upstairs into two bedrooms, an office and an open sitting area, with a full bath. Downstairs, we'll add a master bedroom and bath, open the living room into the teeny office we have down there now and add a little play room off the living room area. Final drawings will be dropped off on Friday. Yeeks - so exciting, and really scary. Except when I realize we will actually have a bath tub. Then - mostly exciting.